February, 2005 E-Newsletter

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Welcome to our February, 2005 Enewsletter! We have something new in store for you which will begin this month. Some of you suggested that we add a personal touch to our Enewsletter, so my hope is that our new “ Family Time ” section will do just that. And in keeping with February's invariable theme of “love” I have included one of my favorite articles from one of my favorite authors called “ The Hag, The Ogre, and The Chocolate Cake ” by Jen efer Igarashi, Senior Editor of The Old Schoolhouse Magazine . You'll learn a lesson on love for sure with this one! This month's product review of Voice of the Martyrs will remind us to love our neighbor by “ remembering them that are in bonds, as bound with them; and them which suffer adversity, as being yourselves also in the body. “ (Hebrews 13:3) We'd also like to remind you of The Good News in Homeschooling as we hear from Brian D. Ray of National Home Education Research Institute (NHERI). We hope you enjoy the new changes, the articles and product reviews, and of course, don't forget the contests and promo. Let us know what you think about it all by emailing devotions@tosmag.com – we're listening!

-- TOS Mag

Family Time

Welcome to this new section of our Enews called Family Time. This section is in response to your suggestions of making the Enews more personal. Let us know if this is something you'd like to see continued. This month, I will begin by telling you about myself (your Enews Editor) and each month I will let you know a little about what's going on in my family and homeschool. I will also include a past or present page from one of my personal homeschool journals that I hope will give you insight into our family and be a blessing to you as well. I am excited to be able to share what is happening personally and in my family, and I hope that you will feel free to let me know about your family, too!

Meet the Editor!

This is me, Deborah Wuehler and I have been so blessed to be married to my dearest friend, Richard, for twenty years. God has bestowed us with seven gifts from heaven (by the time you receive this, I will be only a few days away from delivering baby number seven as is evidenced by the second picture.) Our first-born, Jonathon, is 13 and very mechanically inclined (loves to build and fix things), Christopher is 11 and is our family's communications expert (loves to talk), Hannah is 9 and the resident bread and cookie baker, Joshua is 7 and loves people, Caleb is 4 and loves Joshua, and Mercy will be 2 just before baby Maryanne Hope arrives and is an expert in cuteness. We live in Roseville , California and started homeschooling when our first two boys were 3 and 5 and God has continued to bless our efforts over the years. Hopefully, I will have a picture of our school's principal (and/or “daddy”) in the next issue. He just happened to be on the other end of the camera this time.

Family Journal

I have divided this into sections of what I have learned from the Lord (my Teacher) and what I have learned from my children, as well as some homeschooling thoughts and ideas. This month, I will be starting with a page from my journal dating a few years back.

What I Have Learned From My Teacher

I made blueberry muffins this morning to take to a friend who is moving. When I am making food for others, I usually don't let my family have very much of the share. This morning, I felt convicted to make enough to share with the most important people in my life. After handing four muffins to my husband, he said, “Why are you giving these to me?” I said, “Because you are the most important person in my life.” He answered, “Who are you and where did you put my wife?” Wow, I blessed my husband in such a practical and fairly easy way, and yet I've had the tendency to bless everyone else first. Why do I get it so backwards, sometimes?

It seems that I often neglect the important relationships around me, and do good works for others instead. That's a little backward – I should be blessing my family first. The good works will follow as the Lord has prepared them beforehand for me to walk in. Micah 6:8 says, “He has shown you, oh man, what is good, and what does the Lord require of you? But to do justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

Sometimes I have treated the Lord similarly. I would rather hear a good sermon or read a good devotional than spend that time walking, talking , and listening to Him first . One thing He would tell me would be to love my husband and children and to be kind to them first.

When we came home from visiting my friend, my son wanted to make a batch of cookies for everyone. I was tired, but instead of thinking about the time and mess involved, I listened to that still, small voice that said, “ L ove your son and let him serve”, and I immediately said, “Please do!” The cookies blessed us all, my son is getting better at fractions and following recipes, and I am getting better at listening to the Lord.

What I Have Learned From My Children

The friend I visited has a creek running through her new property. A beautiful piece of heaven here on earth. My children were having a great time throwing stones in the water and hunting for frogs, insects, rocks , and anything else they could find. Eventually they couldn't help themselves and were ankle deep in the cool water. They were so excited with their surroundings and each new discovery. I could feel their joy, and knew I felt the same way when I discover something new about our Lord in His Word. He is called the Living Water, and we are told that we have this Water of Life welling up within us and flowing through us. It is a beautiful piece of heaven right in our hearts. And with each new discovery, we can shout like children at what we see of Jesus Christ in us and in His Word. Everyday we have the opportunity for this kind of joy if we would only be “washed in the water of His word.”

My Prayer

“Living Water, flow through my very heart, soul , and mind. Wash me and make me whole. Spring up within me to overflow to my husband and little ones and those you place in my path each day. Let them see a little piece of heaven in me and desire to be immersed in You.”

Homeschooling Thoughts

Children love to have hands-on science. Today, my children found a grasshopper and opened a wing to look at its span. They found a piece of bone that we think we identified as part of an animal's spine. They found a piece of glass shaped like a chair and polished smooth from the water's current. They discovered that the water in the shade was cooler than the water in the sunlight. And they all had a lot of fun “learning”. Children love to learn science by simply experiencing it, and when able, drawing pictures of what they observe and keeping them in a binder.

Deborah Wuehler is the Devotional and E-Newsletter editor for The Old Schoolhouse Magazine . She lives in Roseville , CA with her husband Richard and their seven gifts from heaven. E-mail Deborah at Devotions@TOSMag.com

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The Hag, The Ogre, and The Chocolate Cake

I was right. Undeniably, un-arguably, hands-down right. I don't exactly remember all the details on what I was right about, but I can tell you it had something to do with a Wal-Mart gift card that his parents gave me for my birthday, which he wanted to use for car accessories. And this was a big deal because I do not get to be that right that often.

I imagine some background is necessary… My husband, Geoff (known as ‘my king' on good days), is the calmest, most literal, black-and-white guy around. He does not ‘freak out', he does not ‘have cows', he does not go on rampages, nor does he become irrational or unmanageable. These are traits common to me, which (unfortunately) I am well practiced in. And while I freely admit that it is I, who generally behaves badly and instigates most conflicts, there are times when ‘my king' can, and does, transform into an Ogre. This was one of them. And I was really excited about that because it is not often that I get to freak out about something almost justifiable.

Geoff worked the swing shift back then so I had plenty of time that morning to foster my hurt feelings; to fall back to my ‘old nature' for counsel; to become indignant; to ponder the injustice of it all; and then to launch a full-blown attack. Usually when Geoff sees me about to detonate he is quick to calm the situation, but on this dark and tempestuous day (and to my surprise), he countered! Not only that…he refused to back down and even called me-- the one clearly in the right-- ‘selfish' and ‘spoiled' and ‘contentious'. ME! I was shocked and flabbergasted. The man who rarely got ruffled and who generally resisted being pulled into battle was practically loading the gun for me. What sport!

By the time he was ready to leave for work he still refused to budge. As he was walking out the door I let him know it wasn't over and to come home prepared for the onslaught I would have ready later that night. He sighed, looked down squarely in my face, tilted his head and commented, “You know, Jen, you are really ugly when you're angry” and then shot out the door before I could find something dangerously heavy to throw. But that was fine by me-- he just hurt my feelings even worse; simply translated… more ammo . It mattered little that my young daughters were all in earshot and taking mental notes to store in their, ‘How to Be a Wife' folder. Frightful! They do not stop learning when our homeschool is out for the day. This is when the ‘real life' lessons are learned. Was I humbled at the thought? No…I was too busy drawing up battle plans.

The next several hours were dedicated to the impending war. Memories were drudged up, scenes were imagined, and hurtful words were scripted. I was ready. I was good and mad and fully prepared to do some damage. My flesh was totally in control-- so you can imagine how torn I was when my Heavenly Father-in-Law (who gave me His son, Geoff, whom I was trying to destroy) stepped in with a shocking suggestion.

Now, I am not a subjective person. I am skeptical of those who come with stories claiming that ‘God called down from heaven and spoke to them directly'. But who else could have planted such an outrageous, unthinkable, irrational thought in my rebellious little head? It was put on my heart, gently and very clearly, “Bake that man a cake.” It was not me who would have thought such a thought. It was heinously out of place.

“Forget it,” I nearly said out loud, “I'm so sure! The one time I can finally triumph, the one time I can finally be right , You want me to deny myself the victory and just ‘let it all go'? He'll think he was right all along, and then he won't change . And furthermore, do You seriously want me to reward such bad behavior by baking the Ogre a cake? Ogres don't deserve cake! They deserve…well, they deserve flies and toads, slimy sludge-filled bogs and other horrible things”. This seemed like a really good argument, and I was pretty proud about my quick thinking.

…But then that voice came again, “And what do Hags deserve?”

Yikes. So I found my cake pan and begrudgingly set about the task. I found the flour, I found the powdered chocolate, I cracked the eggs, and as I began melting the butter, something else started to soften. To my surprise, a memory of love, and of vows and of thankfulness to God for His mercy on such a sinner as me edged its way in. Despite my ‘rightness', despite my hurt feelings and despite my plans to destroy the man who hurt me, God used the simple act of serving my husband in obedience to dissolve my wicked agenda. Obedience always brings reward. Soon, I began loving my husband and a desire to please him welled up. God blessed the tiny shred of obedience that I dredged up and He grew it. And it grew and grew and grew. As the rich smell of chocolate cake filled the kitchen and warmed my home a new plan formed. A plan motivated by the same grace and love that God offered me when He died for my depraved ugliness. The battle plans were shredded. My children were called out and I got on my knees and repented for being such a rotten example. And I pleaded that God would make me a better teacher. And then we wiped our eyes and set ourselves to work. The recipe book came out and a full course dinner was designed. Candles were rummaged out of dusty drawers. A white lace tablecloth donned the dining room table. The children were employed at setting the house in order. Toilets were cleaned, walls were washed, and floors were scrubbed, while a sinful wife, desiring to obey her Lord stepped out in faith, and arranged a home filled with peace, one worthy to be enjoyed by a King.

The children were fed and then sent to bed a little earlier as the plan continued to grow. I was praising God for the precious gift of my husband. I was brimming with memories of when and why we first fell in love. I was humbled at the thought of being such a hindrance to the man who truly did his best to serve our family. The plan grew even bigger, and I marched upstairs and yanked out the “WOW!” dress from the back of the closet and then even slapped on a little make-up. And then I went to the table, sat facing the door, and waited anxiously, and nervously, for him to come home. No doubt he had used his time to prepare for the battle I promised. I heard the keys at the lock and sat up a bit straighter. It was him. The door opened hesitantly, and cautiously, as if he expected to be met with flying pottery. When it swung fully open he was completely caught off guard. He stared at me completely confused. He stepped out, checked the house number, and then came back in looking nervous. “What's going on?” he asked suspiciously. His eyes darted to the meal…to the chocolate cake… to the dress… to the cake… almost to the dress --then back to the cake. “Hello, my Love,” I smiled.

He kept his hand on the doorknob, ready for a quick escape. “Were you sniffing the kids glue during arts and crafts?” he asked. I refused to be deterred, and within minutes of realizing my genuine sincerity, he not only accepted my surrender but also began apologizing for everything and anything he could think of. Even more, he began making promises to become a better leader, and shamefully begged me to use my Wal-Mart card on myself - even offering the checkbook to get something really nice (to which I refused and genuinely countered that car accessories were much more important and obviously necessary). Yes, obedience brings reward. It became a very lovely evening.

He was once again my King. I was once again his Queen. And the next day my children were happy little subjects with parents (on that rare occasion) who modeled for them, Philippians 2, “in humility, consider others better than themselves and look out for the interests of others… “ and James 4:10 - “Humble yourself before the Lord and He will lift you up”, and for once, not Proverbs 21:9 – “Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.”

These are the lessons I want for my children. Humility. Grace. Kindness. Obedience.

What a heavy responsibility. They learn by example. And I am praying for God's grace that they will not be entirely ruined by learning from my ‘old nature' (which still rears up its ugly head) of first responses.

I am praying that God will train me in humility, and that this would not be a rare exception, but how I would deal with opposition consistently. Because honestly, most days I dig in my heels and refuse to let go of my pride - even when I know what the wonderful results of “baking a chocolate cake” will bring. Do I want to live my Christian life faithfully and honor God? Or do I want to cling to being right ? This should be so obvious, yet how we humans struggle! “May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance” 2 Thessalonians 3:5. And mine as well.

Colossians 3: 12 “As God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all in perfect unity.”

1 Thessalonians 5: 15 “Make sure that nobody ever pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other…”

Proverbs 12:4 “A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.”

Jenefer Igarashi, TOS's Senior Editor, lives in Pilot Hill, California, with her husband, Geoff, and their six children ages 16 years to 1 year. Jen enjoys writing fiction and has won two awards from Writers Digest. They enjoy construction projects (as a whole family), good books, and jumping on their trampoline.

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Product Review: Voice of the Martyrs

Voice of the Martyrs
Link Publication - FREE
1-800-747-0085
e-mail: linkinternational@vom-usa.org
http://www.persecution.com/link/resources.cfm

This is an excellent supplement for many subjects in any home school. World Government, World History, Geography, Bible Class, etc. -- Get it for your homeschoolers!

Do you want your children to have a heart of compassion for people around the world? This free subscription can help nurture this vision . The Voice of the Martyrs has been serving the persecuted church around the world for over 35 years.

Their monthly newsletter highlights countries and tells the stories of Christians who put their lives on the line for the Lord. Periodically, they will enclose a map in their mailings so you may track the countries discussed. If you want your children to pray for others around the world, this is a great first step. Their mailings are totally free, and other materials are available for purchase. Your donations are cheerfully appreciated to continue the crucial work of this group.

Editor's Note: Our family loves all of their publications which give us a real life glimpse into the lives of our persecuted brothers and sisters around the world. We receive a monthly newsletter which is more suited for teens and adults, as well as the Link publication for younger children. They do recommend that you preview the materials first, as some stories and pictures are graphic. Deborah Wuehler, Enews Editor

Here is what the Voice of the Martyrs website has to say:

LINK International newsletters for K-8 students present geography, culture, and realities of life for Christians in nations where the gospel is restricted. The 8-page quarterly provides hands on activities and opportunities for kids to participate in projects to pray for and aid persecuted Christians. For a free subscription to Link International and The Voice of the Martyrs newsletters, click here.

* Note to Parents and Teachers
It is highly recommended that you preview the resources before presenting them to children. If you have any question about any LINK resources call 1-800-747-0085 or e-mail us at linkinternational@vom-usa.org.

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Current Contests Sponsored by TOS:

CURRENT CONTESTS!!!!! Check out the great things offered by our generous vendors at our updated website: http://www.thehomeschoolmagazine.com/contests/

The Old Schoolhouse – We still have a few previous issues of the magazine here to give away, as well as two of the Pearl 's excellent child training books available. Just e-mail devotions@tosmag.com if you would like one of these.

Thank you for spending time with us here at The the Old Schoolhouse this month. We'll have more encouraging articles for you next month. If you have any comments just email us at devotions@tosmag.comand don't forget to check out our website and magazine. Until next month, happy homeschooling from Deborah Wuehler and all the TOS Staff !

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The Good News in Homeschooling

Research Shows Good Things

People think it is being sugar coated – what researchers are finding about homeschooling, that is. Whether I am presenting research to a judge in a court case, to other researchers at an academic meeting, or to parents as a homeschool conference, someone is likely to think that I am hiding some dark secrets about how the home educate d are doing academically, psychologically, socially, or in terms of participation in their communities. Is anything being hidden?

Academics

Dozens of studies have now been completed, often involving analyses of standardized achievement test scores. On average, homeschooled students outscore their public (state) school peers by 15 to 30 percentile points. Here are a few examples.

The Stanford Achievement Test scores of hundreds of home educate d students, grades K-12, in Washington State over several years show that they consistently score above the national average at about the 67 th percentile on national norms. The public school average is about the 50 th percentile.

Data on 1,657 families and 5,402 children were analyzed in my nationwide study. These students scored, on average, about 30 percentile points above the state-schooled average. This was in all subject areas: reading, language, math, science, social studies, and study skills. My summer of 2002 study of homeschooling in Ohio also found the homeschooled scoring well above average.

“Socialization”

When someone asks of parent-led home education, “What about socialization?” he usually means, “How will these children learn to get along with others when they are not in large, age segregated groups of their peers most of the day?” He might also mean, “How will this home- educate d child learn to accept the ‘American' way of thinking and living?”

A number of studies have addressed the social and psychological development of the home educate d. Regarding the aspect of self-concept, for example, studies have revealed that the home-schooled are significantly stronger than are public school students. One researcher concluded: “A low anxiety level could be a contributing factor… more contact with significant others, parental love, support, and involvement, peer independence, and a sense of responsibility and self-worth may be other contributing factors.” (see Worldwide Guide to Homeschooling, p. 57-58).

Dr. Larry Shyers found institutionally schooled students to have significantly higher problem- behavior scores than their home- educate d age mates. His study found the conventionally schooled to be considerably more aggressive, louder, and more competitive than the home educate d. He theorized that the home- educate d do better because their key role models are their parents rather than peers. In summary, research to date finds the home educate d doing well in their social, psychological, and emotional development.

A Part of Society?

Sometimes homeschoolers are accused of isolating themselves and their children from their own communities and from society in general. Research is beginning to dispel this claim.

For example, Drs. Christian Smith and David Sikkink, conducted a nationwide study that examined the extent of family involvement in a variety of civic activities. They concluded: “Far from being privatized and isolated, homeschooling families are typically very well networked and quite civically active. The empirical evidence is clear and decisive: private-schoolers and homeschoolers are considerably more civically involved in the public square than are public schoolers …” (see Worldwide Guide p. 75). My recent study of Ohio homeschooling revealed the similar findings.

The good news is that research on homeschooling indicates positive things about home-based education. Parents have re-learned that they can successfully teach, train, and disciple their children. By faith in a Providing God, they can educate their children without taking money from their neighbors via taxation (e.g., conventional public schools, charter schools, vouchers).

It will be fascinating to see what future research reveals about the home educate d as they move into their adult lives of living out their faith in the Lord, raising families of their own, working for pay, and serving in their communities and cultures.

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Thank you for spending time with us here at the Old Schoolhouse this month. We’ll have more encouraging articles for you next month. If you have any comments just email us at Devotions@TOSMag.com and don’t forget to check out our website and magazine. Until next month, happy homeschooling from Deborah Wuehler and all the TOS Staff!

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