I an the queen of saying I never!  I can't even begin to count the times that I have said I

 never and then within a few years (or even months) was doing exactly what I swore I would never do!  One of my most emphatic I nevers was that I would never homeschool.  I am a former public school teacher who believed in the institution of public education.  I even said unkind things about my brother who had chosen to homeschool his children.  Well, sure enough, I had to eat my I never words, and this is why.

            My oldest daughter Eleanor was so excited about starting her 5 - Kindergarten year.  She had attended 4 - Kindergarten half a day the previous year and was trilled to be spending the whole day at school, complete with a packed lunch in her Barbie lunch box.  I have to admit that I was excited too.  You see, Eleanor and i were like oil and water - we just didn't mix well.  My husband would often be baffled by how much we bickered, so when it came to send my daughter to school for the whole day, I was looking forward to it.  But, getting Eleanor out of bed, fed and dresses on time for school each day created huge fights.  She would poke around, eat her cereal very slowly and getting dressed guaranteed a battle in taste.  I would prod, urge, then yell every morning, dash to the car, race to school and then as she was closing the door offer out an I love you!  Not exactly a great way to send her off in the morning.  Afternoons were no better.  When I would pick her up, she would usually be tied and grumpy and proceed to take it out on her toddler brother or baby sister.  She would try out the latest phrase she had learned from her peers, which would send shock waves through my heart, and she would often lament that she just couldn't play with her brother because he was 2 years younger than she was.  Again, arguments would ensue, we would rush around at night getting the kids into bed just in time to turn around and do it all the next day.

            Then a miracle happened.  My daughter was blessed enough to have a terrible teacher that year.  We're talking weekly feature length Disney movies and very little control in the classroom kind of teacher.  As a former teacher I was very concerned and after much deliberation decided I would pull Eleanor out of school just for the remainder of that year.  What happened changed my life forever.

            I fell in love, again, with my daughter, my little girl who was sweet, loving, respectful and inquisitive.  No longer were we rushing around in the morning yelling at each other.  Instead we were making waffles together, curling up on the sofa to start our day with the latest chapter of a Little House book.  Eleanor became friends with her siblings, respecting their differences and learning how to play together.  And she was learning!  She was able to get answers to most of her questions, she was able to grow in a non-threatening environment where she could make mistakes and learn from them.

            I love my family so much and I now wonder how I could ever let someone else have the majority of the day with my child.  I want to be the one to teach my children everything from letters, numbers, and our bodies to stories about our awesome God.  My days are filled with joy and peace now.  The curriculum we chose for our first full year of homeschooling is Tapestry of Grace.  TOG is a history-based curriculum that includes wonderful literature selections, lessons on maps and geography and fun - filled hands - on activities.  TOG also encourages the formation of co-ops, which help us stay on track, gives us people to bounce ideas off of and peers to share accomplishments with.  We absolutely love studying the maps, learning about different cultures and religions, and discovering the people who shaped the minds and attitudes throughout history.  I must admit that I love TOG because I am not only the teacher; I am also a student, learning along side my children.

            I may still forget the valuable lesson I have learned and say I never now and then.  But I am quick to admit that I don't always know the answers and I know when to say I was wrong.

-Tracie Weldie