Now I'm as befuddled as fuddled can be,

Oliver Doobetterdee's in a tree.

And I can't figure out why he's sitting up there,

With a wandering look and a far away stare.

Alas, he seems a bit puzzled, you see.

And that is not normal for Doobetterdees.

I wonder if Oliver's troubled? Oh dear!

Let's listen real close and maybe we'll hear,

Just what is going through Oliver's head?

And suddenly Oliver sighed and he said,

"I just can't believe there is nothing to do.

The work is all done and now playtime is through.

I've eaten my breakfast, my tummy is full.

I've finished my homework, I'm ready for school.

But this is the weekend and I'm just plain bored."

Then Oliver thought to himself, "I'll explore."

So he jumped from the tree and his feet hit the ground,

And he wondered what wonders were soon to be found.

Then he ran just as fast as his short legs could run.

"I'll round up my friends and we'll have so much fun.

I'll gather up Dinkum and Zinkum and Zoe.

I'll gather up Mora and Zora and Flo.

I'll get my friend Doodle and Ornery Spike,

And my best friend of all, I will get Little Mike."

And when they were gathered together at last,

They planned and they plotted their brave little task.

Then Ornery Spike with his eyes all-aglow shouted,

"All follow me, to the edge we will go."

Then silence fell over the Doobetter crowd.

Spike actually said it, and said it out loud.

Why go to the edge of Doobetter Hill,

The thought of it gave everyone quite a chill.

Then Oliver said, "We must not break the rules.

If we go to the edge, we would be silly fools.

The ancients, the elders, your ma and your pa

Have said it's forbidden, we all know the law.

Nobody must go to the edge of the hill.

Nobody has gone, and no one ever will."

Then Ornery Spike said, "I thought you were brave;

We might find a tunnel, we might find a cave.

Who knows what we'll see at the edge of the crest.

Let's see if you're chicken. Let's see who's the best.

If you want to stay, then stay if you will.

I'll go all alone to the edge of the hill."

Then Spike started off and each Doobetterdee

Was just as befuddled as fuddled could be.

"We'd better go with him. It might be okay."

And the Doobetterdees followed Spike all the way.

Through Doobetter Forest, through valleys and peaks,

Through Doobetter meadows and Doobetter creeks,

And soon the end of their journey grew near,

For the edge of Doobetter Hill did appear.

Yes, closer and closer the Doobetters drew

To a fate of what destiny nobody knew.

They stood on the hill and looked over the ledge.

And they leaned way too far out over the edge.

Then they slipped and they tumbled down Doobetter Hill.

Why, they rolled all the way into Littledooville.

And when the Doobetterdees finally stopped,

They all tried to stand but fell down with a plop.

They were dizzy and dazzled and blurry and dazed.

Their heads were all swimming, their minds were a haze.

Then they opened their eyes and what did they see?

A sight that was different as different could be.

A strange sort of people just lying around,

The Littledoobiddles were whom they had found.

Then the Doobetterdees all jumped to their feet.

Why, the thought of a new kind of people to meet,

Was worth all the risks and taking the chance,

And they started to sing and they started to dance.

Then Oliver shouted, "We've all found new friends.

Just imagine the fun, why it never will end."

And Little Mike said, "Don't you all want to play?"

But the Littledoobiddles said, "Just go away!"

"Just leave us alone with our bad attitudes.

We want to be hateful, we want to be rude.

We don't want to play and we don't want to think.

We'd rather be lazy and dirty and stink.

We'd all rather fret and we'd all rather pout,

Than to know of what living is really about.

And happiness, bah! Who needs it, not us?

We'd rather complain and we'd much rather fuss,

Than do something worthy or do something right,

Than to work or to play or to sleep good at night.

Go back where you came from, again we will say.

Take all of your goodness and just go away."

Well the Doobetterdees were surprised and confused.

They'd never seen hatred or been so abused.

Then Dinkum and Zinkum said, "Can this be real?

We don't like the way we're beginning to feel."

And Mora and Zora were scared as could be.

They wanted their mama and papa, you see.

A terrible feeling had Doodle and Flo.

They wanted to leave, they just wanted to go.

And Zoe was so nervous he'd had such a fright.

He just wanted someone to hold him real tight.

And Ornery Spike felt so hurt and alone.

He just wanted someone to take him back home.

And standing in silence was good Little Mike.

He was, after all, such a small little tyke.

Then Oliver took Little Mike by the hand,

And he looked at his sad little Doobetter band.

Then he said to the Doobetterdees every one,

"All I wanted to do was explore and have fun."

Now look at the mess we are in you and I.

We're usually such good little Doobetter guys.

We've never had trouble. We've never been bad.

We've never been mean and we've never been mad.

We've never known sadness. We've never known fear.

Then Oliver sighed as he shed his first tear.

Then all the Doobetterdees started to cry,

And the stars disappeared from their Doobetter eyes.

Then startled they were as they heard someone say,

"This is what happens when you run away.

When you break the law and don't play by the rules

And you don't pay attention in Doobetter schools.

A Littledoobiddle you might be some day.

It's all up to you. Will you choose the right way?"

Then the Doobetterdees turned around and they saw,

Their Doobetter ma's and their Doobetter pa's.

And the mama Doobetterdees held out their arms,

To hug them and hold them and keep them from harm.

What a wonderful super Doobetter surprise.

The stars had returned to their Doobetter eyes.

And they ran to their Doobetter parents and said,

"We must have been out of our Doobetter heads.

Please take us back home, let's get out of this place."

And they hurried back home at a Doobetter pace.

They were happy again; yes, it was quite a thrill,

To know that there's no place like Doobetter Hill.

Michael Daniel is an author and speaker who has been coined "The Next Dr. Suess." www.Doobetter.com